A Woman in Hollywood - Thoughts on the ACLU and other interesting facts

There has been a lot of reaction and calls to action in the press of late about the lack of and expected overt discrimination of female directors.  I’ve sat on it for a minute.  I am a female director.  And I’ve been ‘in the arts’ since high school- began formally pursuing an artistic career when I was 18 and hit the commercial auditioning streets of NYC with real zest.  So I’ve always known that breaking in is hard- for ANY young artist of ANY background or gender.  It’s a competitive field! A lot of people want to be on screens and telling stories and be recognized for their contributions.  Moving on from acting, I knew that breaking into directing wasn’t an easy road but I went for it.  And 5 years later-  I am successful.. I used to say fortunate but I stopped that.  Fortunate implies that some random wheel spun and you landed on a good thing- I’ve been successful in that I got into good schools, created good work, surround myself with talented collaborators who deepen the work, pushed myself harder and kept hustling.  Keep on hustling.  I have my moments where I keep expecting the knock on the door with the BIG PAYING JOB or the WOW WE JUST NOTICED HOW AWESOME YOU ARE call to come in.  But the truth is after a few hours or days of this entitled expectancy I get over myself and settle in and do the work.  The real grit (as was told to me by my AFI teacher and friend producer Brian Udovich).  So I’ve done just that- made a successful short and then three solid features- the second one having just released theatrically and the newest about to premiere at LAFF.  So this is where my story catches up to the news…

I never like to dwell on the negative.  But I will say that what people are finally calling attention to, is out there.  For me I liken it to a big fancy wedding at like The Plaza where there are rooms of buffet tables and the one where the really fancy lobster tails are- there’s a nice looking waiter at the door who just as I am about to enter- politely puts his hand on my arm and suggests that ‘there likely isn’t anything for me inside’  Encourages me ‘down the hall to the left where the fruit salad tower is’.  It’s kind and informed and ‘for my own good’.  And man I am HUNGRY. But I’m a polite girl so I head down to the fruit salads.  But there are a lot of people with lobster tails on their plates.  I’ve begun to pursue larger jobs more aggressively now- feeling ready with three full features under my belt and a good reputation- and I keep being redirected: to smaller films- smaller tables- smaller goals.  And while I may not have an Avengers movie in me just yet I do have action and suspense and heartfelt characters and female driven fare and male driven fare and I know I can direct an actor be they male or female.  And run a set and get what I want and not make people nervous.  A lot of us can.

Some say a female directed story isn’t viably commercial.  Have you seen Pitch Perfect 2? I have a son and daughter and I don’t look at one and say you are like this and the other and say you are like that- certainly not based on their GENDER.  They are individuals with different tastes and likes and dislikes and desires and needs.  Molly likes basketball.  Jack likes to wear sunglasses.  Who knows what their taste in movies will be.  And I certainly won’t let the filmmakers gender dictate which thing they will like.

So while overt discrimination may still be determining its case..I lend my voice to the newfound awareness by saying- ‘Hey- I’ll take a lobster tail please.’  

Voices are voices.  We should all get the chance to be heard.

Releasing DAPmovie

In 4 short weeks my second feature film Dial A Prayer is releasing theatrically and on-demand.  I'm excited and terrified.  Well maybe not terrified.  Nervous. The thing is, although I am entirely grateful to have a second film receive distribution, I'm still crazy nervous.  Even with the fact that so far the support of cast, distributor and all other parties involved in the release has been fantastic. And the trailer kindof rocks. Still. Nervous. See this film did not have a festival ride, we received excitement for the title early on and went straight for the sale- which ultimately is the end goal for any independent film hoping to 'launch' on a festival ride right? Sure.  But for me, not having had any experience or engagement with an audience or reviewer just puts all the more pressure on April 10. Because it's the first time.  The real time.  It's like ON.

From the moment I first starting writing Dial A Prayer it was like some other force was pulling the story out of me- driving me to tell it. I had no choice but to make it.  I was hesitant to send it to anyone- worried they would see prayer in the title and make some quick judgement on me- the material.  Was I some hidden Jesus freak? Trying to cash in on Heaven Is For Real's crazy box office success?  Or was I going to piss off those people who did have faith- mock something- not give it it's due respect.  Burn the church/take down the man. There was no way to preface any conversation with what I wanted the movie to be or exactly what story I was trying to tell.  You see I had to put my complete and uttermost faith in myself and this story.  I had to hand it over to potential investors and agents and casting directors and dps and friends and ACTORS and just TRUST that they would get it.  That they would get it in their way. See that it isn't really a movie about God or Christianity is a yes or any kind of faith is a no but really about believing in something bigger.  The power of that. The power of forgiveness.  And again not in a cheesy afterschool special kind of way. But in my way. This wild funny dramatic messy bright way. That was my hope.

I couldn't be more proud of the film we ended up making.  And I couldn't be more grateful to my producers at Storyboard Entertainment and my gorgeous cast led by Brittany Snow and my dear friend and mentor William H Macy.  I'm grateful that my mom read it early on (out loud to my Dad) and told me to keep going.  That Jason Potash responded to the 65 page draft and always kept it in his sights to make sure we made it. That Sylvia Sether told me I was a writer when I swore that I wasn't. For my husband for waiting to watch it until it really was done and EVERYONE who put their own faith in the story we wanted to tell. Those were some cold Michigan exterior shoot days.

I'm not sure what will happen on April 10th.  But I'm happy that that day will come and that this seed of a story will have a chance to grow into something really BIG.